An Artist From The Past

As I was in the final stages of preparing my book, I had thought it would be great to have some illustrations that could highlight the meaning of the poems, so that the story could be presented visually.

But somehow, for months, I couldn't seem to connect with any artist that could illustrate a poem's meaning, and furthermore, it had to be painted or illustrated in a style that suited me and the concept of the book.

I then wondered if I could paint them myself, as I really hadn't painted with a brush since taking Art Exam in secondary school (high school), which was way too long ago... 

While agonizing over this matter, I saw a Facebook post from Phillip Wong boldly announcing, "Everyone Can Paint!" So, it seems the moment had come for me to test myself, so I decided to call on Phillip to give me some professional feedback. 

So off I went proudly to an art gallery. The cool part was painting on canvas, which was a first for me, too! But, I didn't realize it was going to be that hard to imagine... a picture! Using acrylic for the first time, it was also hard to figure out the techniques in order to get the look I imagined.

But, all in all, I managed to finish 6 pictures which were inserted at the beginning of each of the 6 chapters of the book. Although I think I can do better, it was truly an emotional, even tiring, experience that helped me learn how to use my imagination better.

Also, I have to thank the very patient Phillip, who encouraged me to paint and accept that whatever I painted is distinctive of me, for there is no right or wrong in art, and that I am truly free to create any new world on that canvas. :) 

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Then True Love Comes

Then True Love Comes, was a title that came unexpectedly. Someone that I had just met took my palm and told me "You must trust in someone even though it is risky to trust in this person, then true love comes." 

That shocked me. This message told me that it was not only about finding that true love in someone else who will come, but it was about not trusting my own heart. And this reveals the deepest truth -- that I did not even open up to my own heart to love myself, so how could anyone else truly love me?

(No, he was not trying to hit on me. That was a gay man who took my palm.)

I have been a student of spiritual and personal development for years. The book that most impacted me years ago, when I was fervently searching for answers after my fiance left me, was Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsh. From there I was influenced by spiritual & motivational gurus and authors like Deepak Chopra, Paulo Coelho, Abraham Hicks, Bashar, Louise Hays, Pam Grout, Sonia Choquette, T. Harv Eker, Anthony Robbins, Dale Carnegie, Zig Ziglar to name a few.  

I graduated from Western Michigan University with a major in Production (Communication) and minor in Journalism. Trained in piano and ballet throughout childhood, I loved the performing arts and was a regular on stage.

For the past 20 years, I worked as a producer director of many entertainment and reality shows, from high-profile Wheel of Fortune to Fear Factor, to beauty pageants, talent competitions, reality shows, gameshows, dramas & tv movies in my home country. 

What Happened To Me

Recently, I suffered through a difficult project resulting not only in loss of money for my company but also in loss of self confidence, and found myself at one of the lowest points of my professional life, without monetary support.

It was then that I came clean with how I felt about my life. My career had not given me satisfaction for years. People know me as a Producer all my career. But I had lost my bliss. And I believe in the universal Law of Attraction which was so apparent in bringing me the negative situations that I kept facing.

I didn't only want to spend days and nights as a behind-the-scenes Producer, a stressful job managing big teams and big budgets, and being relevant only to providing services to the industry. I also wanted to touch the world through my personal experiences, beliefs and through my own creative work. This required me to go back to the rooms of past indulgence and search for bliss that has been shelved away  -- creative writing & music.

Now, with my background as a Producer, how was I going to produce my own life the way I successfully styled and branded my shows? And if our life were a movie, then each of us, surely, is the star of our life movie. How do I be the star of my own life, one who experiences True Love?

The Ultimate Secret

This was a free gift that my coach gave to us students. What a little package of power it is!

I call myself a law student at the University of God. Yes, God has made this life a learning experience for us, and after living through roller coaster years of happiness and hardships, I had a deep unending inner urge to find out the secret to making it happen for me the way I want it to be. 

And so I have been an ardent fan of spiritual, self-help, motivational teachings -- I have learned from many teachers, many of them great story tellers and experiencers themselves -- unconventional, mind-opening concepts and parables. 

I know I have found the concept :  the secret of achieving my dreams -- and somewhat understand it. But what I was lacking in was belief and practice. That explained the struggles and strife to lead the kind of life I dreamed of.

But this book, with its author unknown, summed up my entire learning experience about the magic formula of living the life I wanted, into simple examples and terms I could understand. 

Basically, the concept that I connected with this time was the attitude of "willingness." Having the vision is the first step. The desire and willingness to do whatever it takes to achieve it is the next step. That means no resistance, no obstacles, no blockages. Open up the channel. Then you will see the universe lead you step by step to whatever you want to be and to have. 

And although I will not start distributing this booklet around, as I believe when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. No matter how much I tell someone of my beliefs and try to help someone change their twisted beliefs, if you are not willing, I am also unable to change you, even if I am Mother Teresa.

But I hope to be able to meet you one day when you are ready, and not only to share with you but to show to you HOW you can live the life that you absolutely want. 

Follow your bliss. :)

Secret Rebel

I am so grateful to God that I had such a long childhood and teenage time, but I'm sure, so did many of you.

I am grateful because looking back at my childhood, I really enjoyed the chance to read so many story books. 

Now all grown up, and in earth terms, "getting old," I hardly finish one book a year, with the distractions of work and managing company and getting over the frustrations of life. 

I was mostly a studious and obedient girl, doing well in school, but at heart, I was a secret rebel. Why a rebel? 

I was put into a school where I sat near to girls who read English and spoke English at home. I spoke Chinese at home and was very bad in English.

But eventually my heart was determined I was going to be good in English too, and so I started borrowing books from my friends, and having my family buy English story books for me. Mom, being a school teacher, started to borrow English books from her school library for me. 

We read the books during class by hiding them in our school textbooks and reading them on our laps. Before sleep, I would do the same thing in my room, when I should be reviewing my school lessons or exams. 

So, the secret rebel grew up with the children in Enid Blyton books and other classic stories like Treasure Island, Tom Brown's Schooldays, in ancient faraway lands of magic and exciting adventures in the rolling countryside. I learned words like 'enchanted,' 'high tea,' 'scones,' 'farm,' all rather exotic and eye-sparkling to me. 

Now I can hardly remember the exact stories, but their memories still fill up a heart longing for magic,  the heart of the secret rebel.