The Ultimate Secret

This was a free gift that my coach gave to us students. What a little package of power it is!

I call myself a law student at the University of God. Yes, God has made this life a learning experience for us, and after living through roller coaster years of happiness and hardships, I had a deep unending inner urge to find out the secret to making it happen for me the way I want it to be. 

And so I have been an ardent fan of spiritual, self-help, motivational teachings -- I have learned from many teachers, many of them great story tellers and experiencers themselves -- unconventional, mind-opening concepts and parables. 

I know I have found the concept :  the secret of achieving my dreams -- and somewhat understand it. But what I was lacking in was belief and practice. That explained the struggles and strife to lead the kind of life I dreamed of.

But this book, with its author unknown, summed up my entire learning experience about the magic formula of living the life I wanted, into simple examples and terms I could understand. 

Basically, the concept that I connected with this time was the attitude of "willingness." Having the vision is the first step. The desire and willingness to do whatever it takes to achieve it is the next step. That means no resistance, no obstacles, no blockages. Open up the channel. Then you will see the universe lead you step by step to whatever you want to be and to have. 

And although I will not start distributing this booklet around, as I believe when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. No matter how much I tell someone of my beliefs and try to help someone change their twisted beliefs, if you are not willing, I am also unable to change you, even if I am Mother Teresa.

But I hope to be able to meet you one day when you are ready, and not only to share with you but to show to you HOW you can live the life that you absolutely want. 

Follow your bliss. :)

My Tears, The Proof of My Abundance

I woke up this morning, suddenly feeling an overwhelming urge for love. 

Tears started to roll as I released the tension I felt the entire last 2 weeks, which I did not even realized I held.

I had felt as though it was so hard to make a decent living. It is so hard to keep doing proposals and to be questioned if I'm worth investing any money in. 

I don't want to keep having to justify ROI's (return on investments) on things that have never be done and which is just my inspiration for now, from ideas shared by others, that is just my gut feel, that requires my belief and a little magic from nowhere.

It is so hard to keep wanting the approval from others because I have to pay my bills and enjoy my life. 

Tired, I just let go the tension from me, imagining the tension blowing away, leaving my body. I clicked on an Abraham Hicks video to let the message of allowing wealth into my subconscious as I lay in the comfort of my bed. And I asked God to help me. 

I looked at my phone and I noticed a message from a friend sent earlier this morning. I had heard from him several days ago. But a message like this, out of the blue, in the early morning was surprising.

Good morning. Blessings are always here. Good luck always comes.
in better English, may sound like: May blessings always be around, and may good fortune always come.

Tears rolled down even more. It's as though God had asked him to send it to me. 

Then, suddenly I thought back to the bigger picture. Why is it that when we cry, it is water that rolls out from our bodies. What a thought, huh...

Tears of sadness, tears of joy...but still, it is water. 

The outpouring tears must be carrying something with them our from my body...tensed energies, frustrations, disappointments, fear...detoxifying me. 

Then I thought about water....I have an issue because it is not my habit to drink lots of water, and I am told I have water retention, so I am doing my best to remind myself to drink up!

Water....it is abundant throughout our earth. Now, now, I am not the type to go analyzing the state of our earth scientifically and neither am I such a spiritual master to tell you the links between the scientific and the spiritual world.

But I believe this world, this universe, this earth is spiritual creation that is scientifically sound. God -- whoever the universal forces that has created us and this earth, is the master creator.

According to universetoday.com, water makes up 71% of the earth's surface. Roughly 96.5% of all water on earth is contained in the oceans as salt water, and 3.5 % is freshwater lakes and frozen water locked up in glaciers and the polar ice caps. 

Then I thought, oh my God. This is already abundance. If I have this abundance readily without my effort, I can have many other types of abundance just by acknowledging it is already there. My tears has led me to understand what is abundance. 

God has given us what we need to survive. We have an abundance of water for our bodies, when we are born on this earth. And He was so clever to freeze some of the water as storage so we will never run out...and if we ever do, rain will come. (But I haven't yet figured out why we let ourselves suffer from floods.)

I always believe the Chinese culture knows the secrets of this universe very clearly. From the beginning, we talked about 气（qi）-- energy: good energy, bad energy,  风水feng shui and all that, which is linked to everything that happens to us. Particularly in 风水feng shui,  water is a symbol of wealth -水 (shui) . When we talk, we sometimes refer to money as 水 (shui). And there is something about the effect of the moon creating high tides and low tides that affects us, naturally without us realizing. 

The pieces in my mind are coming together. I am being knocked into my senses.

I Deserve To Be Wealthy

I struggle with the idea that I deserve to make money. 

Why do I say that?

This is what I have realized lately. After the prompting from my closest confidant, I decided to propose a fee which is double of what I used to earn every month, to a millionaire who had sought my services for his upcoming project.

I would never be the one who takes advantage of someone. On the contrary. I always sell myself short. And I am unhappy about doing that.

Because I can do so much. I can't deny that I have been blessed with multiple talent, skills and years of experience gained through dedication, long hours, mistakes, failures, betrayals, analyzing my shortfalls and climbing up again.

Producing, directing, managing, running a company, budgeting, editing, writing, singing, composing, dancing, music, artistic sense, casting, styling, media release, marketing, branding, positioning, spiritual learning, ....no kidding, I have to touch most of these areas in whatever I do. 

So after submitting the initial proposal for my services, my confidant took a look at it and said that my workscope as the project director is so huge that I deserve to put a high price for my services -- not overpriced, but really what I deserve. Not only that, because these services will take up most of my time. 

But after I sent the proposal to the millionaire, I worried when I did not receive any reply immediately. Several days later, I received a call, and met up with the potential client. He discussed the timeline and the project's expected job with me but did not immediately agree with the fee I asked for, and instead, he wanted to re-propose a package fee for me within the next week. 

So, I was a little disappointed. But that night itself I went out to celebrate with a full Korean bbq dinner. After all, I am practising the vibration of wealth, and this was something at the back of my mind that I was aware of, which kept trying to win over the devil in my head that this was the only job available and which had the potential to pay me the kind of money I deserve. 

I work on my own. I have a company. Ever since I quit corporate employment, I've struggled with the idea that I deserve a high personal income. 

This is because outside of the big corporate employer, other partners and clients that I have met are always trying not to pay us. ??? Or always trying to pay us less than what we deserve. ???

But, but, but food price have gone up years ago....and so has the price of homes and cars...toll and taxes and more taxes...

Why do I have to lower my income?

Six months ago, a close friend who was pushing me to take a job with his potential investor said that I was too expensive, and chided me about asking for such high pay at a time when the economy is down.

I got so offended. That meant that I didn't get any job from him. And they proceeded to launch their new company and project without me.

So there I am, Miss "I'm So Old & Senior & Experienced & Award Winner & So Brilliant That You Could Not See..." should I stoop so low as to only ask for pay that is only worthy for somebody with 1/4 of my experience and talent?

So, what happened to all the spiritual teachings I have had about aligning with myself (but I have to accept menial pay or the economy is not doing well and nobody will pay this kind of money for a person like me or I am living in the wrong country?)

So I still have not gotten any answer yet about the job with the millionaire.

But I just took this time of no-income-in to deal with myself. Am I going to accept that I do not deserve to be paid highly and that nobody would pay me that highly?

I am adjusting my expectation -- not to lower my expected income, but instead I am adjusting my expectation that the income and the wealth that I desire will come through many ways...many, many ways...and I deserve to be wealthy....I deserve to be wealthy...my wealth comes through many, many ways ... unconditional abundance.

Secret Rebel

I am so grateful to God that I had such a long childhood and teenage time, but I'm sure, so did many of you.

I am grateful because looking back at my childhood, I really enjoyed the chance to read so many story books. 

Now all grown up, and in earth terms, "getting old," I hardly finish one book a year, with the distractions of work and managing company and getting over the frustrations of life. 

I was mostly a studious and obedient girl, doing well in school, but at heart, I was a secret rebel. Why a rebel? 

I was put into a school where I sat near to girls who read English and spoke English at home. I spoke Chinese at home and was very bad in English.

But eventually my heart was determined I was going to be good in English too, and so I started borrowing books from my friends, and having my family buy English story books for me. Mom, being a school teacher, started to borrow English books from her school library for me. 

We read the books during class by hiding them in our school textbooks and reading them on our laps. Before sleep, I would do the same thing in my room, when I should be reviewing my school lessons or exams. 

So, the secret rebel grew up with the children in Enid Blyton books and other classic stories like Treasure Island, Tom Brown's Schooldays, in ancient faraway lands of magic and exciting adventures in the rolling countryside. I learned words like 'enchanted,' 'high tea,' 'scones,' 'farm,' all rather exotic and eye-sparkling to me. 

Now I can hardly remember the exact stories, but their memories still fill up a heart longing for magic,  the heart of the secret rebel.